I feel like this blog story of mine needs a place marker here for the story to be complete. I'll let Joel say it in the words he used on his facebook post.

 Divorce has ripple effects through the family system. I've known for a year and my children have known since October. I had no idea it would be so hard--that it would feel like a death. I don't consider myself someone who cries easily, but tears have come regularly and at times when I've least expected them. My heart still hurts over the loss of my sister in law and friend. I'll consider my hurt and sadness a sign that I loved genuinely and well.