Saturday, November 15, 2014

A Title?? I Can't Decide On One.

I want to write about post pregnancy thyroid stuff, but I can't decide what to say. And that's my biggest problem--I can't decide anything! That is not like me at all! I'm the family decision maker.

For the past 2 weeks, multiple times a day, I've thought, "I just don't feel like myself."

At 11:00pm, even if I haven't laid down at all during the day, my brain is still going and I lay awake for a long time before I fall asleep.

My brain thinks of all kinds of things I want to do--scrapbook pages, books, cleaning, things to read online and on and on--and my body knows it is tired.

I get wound up so tight on the inside I end up having an uncharacteristic outburst with the children. And then an equally uncharacteristic meltdown afterwards.

I've texted my Mom telling her that I can't decide what part of the day we should come to her house and I can't decide what to have to eat at Anna's birthday party.

I did catch it quickly this time. I always second guess myself because there are so many other factors involved--like just having birthed a baby. When I talked it out with Mom this time I was second guessing myself and not wanting to just jump to conclusions when I realized that I do have 10 years and 4 pregnancies of experience with this thyroid stuff. And my experience proved right. My thyroid is high. I'm on day 2 of the new meds. It takes a good week to feel a difference and 2 weeks for the full effect.

Since baby pictures are far more interesting than thyroid stuff, here is a sweet moment from today: I was holding Isaiah and Josiah came over and said, "I'll hold him for you, Mom. I thought you might want a break." Josiah sat beside me and contentedly held a sleeping Isaiah for 15 minutes.

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