Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Patience

I'm doing better, really. I've had to remind myself a million times to be patient. If I could just sleep I think I would feel really close to normal. I quit taking the Benadryl because I felt so drugged in the morning. Instead I am taking Tylenol Allergy Sinus which has a much lesser dose of antihistamine in it. It is allowing me to sleep, but it is a light sleep with dreams. In the morning I'm not sure if I've slept and then I start realizing that certain thoughts were dreams and so then convince myself that I did, indeed, sleep. This afternoon I took a nap and actually slept pretty deeply. I needed about 1o more hours of that when I woke up! I felt like I'd been hit by a train!

So Linda and Mom are still helping me this week. I'm trying really hard to make sure I'm ok before I plunge back in to the normal routine. I do not want to overwhelm myself and land back in the nervous pit. If I could just get a normal night's sleep.... One of these nights it is bound to happen.

I did more today. I cooked the meals and did the dishes. I was more involved with the children as far as discipline and normal interaction. They look cute to me again! I watched Josiah want to give Jeremy high 5 last night and it made me smile. Josiah has been cuddly after his naps recently and I've been able to really enjoy that.

The mornings are still the hardest time of day. It is then that I feel most discouraged and wonder if I am ever going to feel normal again because I feel so tired. I will. It is coming.

I had to throw this video in for the fun of it. It is of Aliza taking pictures at Laura and Linda's birthday party.

3 comments:

Meghan said...

Love that video! So glad you're doing better. One of these nights you're going to sleep reaaally well, and it'll feel sooo good!! It'll happen!!

Natalija said...

have you thought about something more natural, like melatonin? just a thought

Christy said...

yea!!! I am so glad you are feeling a little better!!! Can't wait until you feel "normal" again!